Obviously this painting appeals to preschoolers because the bear is blue. BLUE! Ha! How wacky is that?? Blue Bear--wacky blue bear, that is--zany, crazy, quirky, kooky Blue Bear has apparently stepped into white paint. Ha, ha! Oh, all those madcap hijinx he gets into! The sunglasses are so wacky! The self-portrait is wacky! The bear sits upright. Real bears don't do that. That makes it wacky! And it wears sunglasses in addition to being blue, also wackily unlike bears found in nature! As everyone knows, preschoolers love wacky things and this painting is very wacky. Using geometry, it is proven that preschoolers will like this painting. Additionally, teenagers will like it because they are all morally decadent and the blue bear is obviously being itemised as well as high on CRACK COCAINE. The decadence is permeating--suffocating, even. Only decadent bears wear pink glasses and have blue fur. I am disgusted by the shameless decadence of Blue Bear. Teenagers like decadence so by the reflexive property of equality they also like this bear. Preschoolers and teenagers both love this painting to an obscene, almost to a perverse, extent, on the one hand because of its embarrassingly superfluous wackiness, on the other because of its shocking decadence, and on the mutated third because it bribed them with a few select derivatives of organic acids; in particular, psychedelic drugs.

Everyone loves Blue Bear.