When it all comes down, only the brave and the fools are around.

By the time word of the destruction of a small Katina town reached the ears of Star Fox, it was too late to save anyone. The Cornerian army’s only lead as to the cause was a radioed cry for help they had received seven hours prior; it was obviously desperate and rushed. All it read was “Stone dog, please help...families...fire...come...I’m dying...”

The gruesome message sent a chill to their very hearts, but the Cornerian Army filled them in on what they should be feeling. “It was just an army reserve base,” someone said. “Come on, it was just a little town! We can still win without those people.”

The stone dog mention got everybody thinking about Gerdendrul; they still needed to defeat it. Besides, the debris needed searching anyway, so Star Fox plus Katt and Bill and minus Falco set off for Katina in less-than-high spirits. They stopped at Fortuna before arriving, though, and landed momentarily. Katt didn’t want to go back on the surface of the planet, but she dashed out of the hangar bay, unlocked the Cat’s Paw, jumped in, and flew it hastily right back into the hangar. They lost no time taking off since none of them wanted to be there any more than she did.

To cheer them up, Bill suggested hitting the town for a night or so before they went out to Kamilton’s remains. Katina had no shortage of big cities, so they decided that Haransdale would be a nice place to visit.

Slippy pulled out his liquefying gun, which he’d forgotten he even had, and was having a ball shooting at all the glass display windows as they strolled down the street. The glass didn’t fall into little puddles, though, and everyone (including Slippy) was wondering why not. Slippy came up with a hack theory. “I think it’s the air pressure difference inside the store and outside,” he explained. “If someone opened the door while the glass was in its liquid state, it would probably collapse. But as it is, I think I’m just purifying the glass for the storeowners.”

“Good thing, too,” Peppy muttered, “or you’d have to pay for the windows.”

 As it turned out, Slippy was way off about the air pressure thing.  The real reason was that the glass was attached all the way up and down.  If it had been only a half window, it would have collapsed.  But let's not blame Slippy.

Meanwhile, Katt had dashed off into a big department store and dished out a whole wad of cash for a nice new outfit. She had packed away her faded purple flight suit and replaced it with a white and blue jumpsuit, accessorised with shiny blue gloves and boots (that hadn’t exactly been cheap), and two blue scarves, one of which she was using as a belt.

“So have you found yourself a new flight suit?” Slippy asked.

“Nah,” she said, eyeing her outfit. “This is kind of a novelty, but it looks too much like a superhero costume to be worn all the time.”

That wasn’t their first stop that day in the shops. Katt was at home here, and she insisted on everyone at least trying something on. “After all,” she’d insist. “Those triangle belts are so last season, and the bandannas aren’t exactly fashionable either.”

Although Katt told them they looked nice in the outfits they tried on, Fox thought that clothes shopping was too girly an activity for anyone on his team, and the others agreed, so nobody but Katt actually bought anything.

After a few hours at this, Katt was just getting warmed up, but the others were pretty much exhausted. Balancing loads of shopping bags and boxes, she grumbled a little but readily agreed to stopping for supper and a drink.

They thought about a nice little Juhupon restaurant, but one look at the prices sent them scurrying. They tried about ten other places before they found something passable--and they only ate there because Katt threw a fit when Peppy suggested fast food.

“How long is the wait, sir?” Fox inquired, trying his best to sound snooty.

“About two hours,” responded the snobbish panther.

Fox pulled out three pound notes. “Are you sure?”

Bill spoke up. “Excuse me a moment, sir,” he said, grabbing Fox’s arm and dragging him outside. “Are you some kind of nut?” he shrieked at Fox. “Three pounds?!”

“Well, how much was I supposed to give him?” Fox answered, puzzled.

Bill sighed hopelessly.

Two hours and four minutes later, they sat down wearily at a round hardwood table that gleamed in the dim light. It was around ten minutes before the waiter came around to ask about drink orders.

“Don’t get anything too heavy,” Bill advised. “We’ll go to a club after we’re finished eating, and we can get drinks then. Just have water or a soda.”

That said, everyone ordered heavily caffeinated sodas, most of them sugared too, except Katt’s, since she ordered Diet Coke. Refills were free, too, so it was only a matter of time before everyone was suppressing giggles at the slightest provocation.

When they were finally ready to order their meals, Peppy embarrassed Katt and Bill by having a burger and french fries. “At least it’s a veggie burger,” Peppy said, offended.

When the food arrived, they tried to eat slowly and primly. This business took them the better part of an hour. When they finally finished their food and had paid the sizable bill, they ambled outside, distraught.

“I guess we’re just not cut out for the city life, guys,” Slippy sighed.

“Maybe you’re not,” Bill and Katt said in unison. Then they sort of half glared at one another.

“So you want to go to a club, still, or just find a hotel?” Fox yawned.

“Well, I’m beat,” Katt said. “But there are tons of nice hotels in Haransdale, so find one of those, not some dingy motel with the plaster falling and plumbing that was invented before the discovery of water.”

“I’m not sure if we can afford one of those, Katt,” Peppy whined.

“Oh, come on!” she squealed. “You have money! And even if you don’t, I do, so I’ll stay in a nice place, and if you’re too cheap, you can stay in one of those roach hells for all I care. But not me. No sir, not this simple farmgirl from Arkansas!”

Slippy rolled his eyes. “Whatever, Katt.”

In the end they did find themselves at a ritzy hotel with a twenty meter ceiling, a winding marble staircase up to the third floor and plush-carpeted lifts up to the next twenty. There were two queen-sized beds in each suite, but nobody except Katt could afford a suite. She waved triumphantly at them as she danced off to her room, leaving the rest of them scraping together their money. Slippy called out after her as she went. “Hey Katt, there are two beds in the suite! Why should you get it all to yourself?”

“You can talk about that amongst yourselves,” she called back, “and you can darn well pay for it yourselves, too! Au revoir!”...and then the lift doors closed and she was gone.

All said, they could afford about one and a half rooms between themselves. At last Fox sighed and pulled off his shoe, carefully extracting the two twenty-pound notes therein. “All right,” he said grumpily, “there’s the rest of the money, but you can forget about having enough for breakfast tomorrow.”

Then they got their room keys and went off to their collective rooms. A few minutes later, an eagle-eyed watcher could have seen Katt stealing downstairs and dashing through the lobby, then making for the nearest nightclub. About five minutes after that, this was repeated, only by Bill. It turned out later that Bill had told Fox he was going to get some ice. (author’s note: There were two beds in each room, so don’t you get any ideas, now.)

* * *

The next morning found Katt and Bill sleeping it off in their rooms, Fox wondering how they were going to eat that day what with all their money gone to paying for the rooms, and Slippy sneaking down the hall to the vending machines for some candy. Peppy was in the hotel restaurant, forking over the last of his money for a cup of coffee and a Danish.

Fox, Slippy, and Peppy amused themselves by watching cable television in their rooms, exploring the gargantuan lobby, and throwing pennies into the exquisite fountain that decorated said lobby. The lobby also had two escalators in it, and Slippy entertained himself for a short while by walking up the down escalator until a guard told him to stop.

They passed the day this way until it was checkout time. Everyone knew they couldn’t hope to afford a second night, so Bill was dragged bodily out of his bed and forced out of the room. Nobody knew exactly where Katt’s room was, but she showed up in the lobby soon after, bleary-eyed but ready to turn in her key.

They rode a bus back to where they had started, and ROB landed the Great Fox so they could climb aboard. There the guest quarters were prepared for Katt and Bill was allowed to use Falco’s room so they could continue recovering.

Eventually night fell, and they slept soundly, knowing that Kamilton’s remains awaited.

Chapter 12