"They DO say you can jump better than a froggy!" ~Mallow

"I must have your autograph!" ~ King Nimbus

"Hey Mario! Look what you're standing in!" ~Mushroom person

"Observe... the thick mustache... covering the sad, innocent smile of a simple fool... And the sideburns... conveying his blue collar roots. And the legs... well defined... Strong. The legs of the masses!" ~Garro

"Oh, oh, oh... Mario's already here... He's a fast one, he is..." ~Shy Away

"Mario! Let's say you and I get hitched in a few years, okay? Just...give me time to grow into my mother's wedding dress!" ~Mushroom girl

"Mario always shows up at about this time to spoil the fun." ~Booster

"Mario! Don't look into other people's things!" ~Toadstool

"Dear Mario, Please come to the castle. I've baked a cake for you. Yours truly, Princess Toadstool. Peach!" ~Toadstool

"Then you're THE Mario! WE know about you!" ~Geno

"YOU FOOLS!" ~Chef Torte

"Over here, NOW! I'll crush you all!" ~Smithy

"Mario! I didn't think you'd make it through my maze. But since you're here, I've got something to show you." ~Iggy Koopa

"My, this is a treat! I had no idea Halloween came early this year. What an ugly Halloween costume." ~Wendy O. Koopa

"Dinosaur? Hear that, guys? This plumber says we live inside a dinosaur." ~ Donny the Micro-Dolphin

"What a comedian! First dinosaurs, now cows. Everyone knows cows are extinct!" ~Donny the Micro-Dolphin

"Oh. You did have tickets after all. They must be letting everyone into these things nowadays." ~Circus guard

"Okay, genius, what's next?" ~Luigi

"I just hope Mario isn't going into any sewers--he's wearing my good dress!" ~Princess Toadstool

"Eeep!" ~ a mouse in Ft. Koopa

"Here we go!" ~Mario

"Boing! Boing!" ~Mario's evil clone

"Hello, lunch." ~ a decidedly palatably deprived Bowser

"All we can do is wait here. Don't let us down!" ~the Chancellor

"I call it 'A Plumber's Lament'." ~Garro

"Mario, what's with the silent treatment?" ~Toad

"You picked the wrong people not to bounce with, bub!" ~Shyster

"Hey, maybe we could bounce ON HIS HEAD!" ~Shyster

"Goodness! You're so kind! I'd like to reward you." ~Booster

"Oops....I think....I missed!" ~Gaz

"The chain Mario, hit the chain!!!" ~Princess Toadstool
"Mario, the beetles are gone. Let me guide you to Seaside Town to turn in the Beetle Box." ~Toad
"(No way!)" ~Mario
"Whatever." ~Toad

"(1000 warm up jumps. Begin!)" ~Mario

Mallow Quotes

"I'm a frog, but I can't jump. Embarrasing, huh?" ~Mallow

"That rainstorm we had a while back--that was YOU, wasn't it?" ~Frogfucious

"I'm paying ya back in spades, kid!" ~Croco

"You fools couldn't chase down a pumpkin!" ~Croco

"Pipe down, fluffy!" ~Punchinello

"Mario! Look at me! I'm a prince!" ~Mallow

"Yes, Mallow, the time has come for you to take the bus!" ~King Nimbus

"That's 'STAR ROAD', my fluffy little friend..."~Geno

"What a coincidence! There's a prince here with the same name as me!" ~Mallow

"Umm..what was I after again?" ~Mallow

Geno Quotes

"Mom! I just saw Geno walking in the forest!" ~Gaz
"Uh-huh. And isn't Geno the one who broke my lamp the other day?" ~Gaz's mother

"STOP! You don't know what you're doing. RETURN that star to me!" ~Geno

"I serve...a higher authority..." ~Geno

"Yo! Chill out!" ~Geno

"Well, we've won the battle. Now I hope we don't lose the war." ~Geno

"Go get 'em, Geno! You're the main man!" ~Gaz

"I oughta rip your stuffing out!" ~Bowser

"Let's get this show on the road!" ~Geno

"A stranger you are... and strange looking at that!" ~Bowyer

Bowser Quotes

"We're pretty sure Mr. Moustache can't break in here. But that turtle looks pretty mean!" ~Snifits

"I know what you're thinking....all this power, AND looks, too!" ~Bowser

"I'm lightning in a bottle! I'm an earthquake in a can!" ~Bowser

"On Tuesday, I'll call a vote and have myself elected Grand Imperial Boss." ~Bowser

"This is gonna be excellent!" ~Bowser

"Eyyyyyyyyyyaaaaa!" ~Bowser

"My, we're a little touchy today, aren't we?" ~Smithy

"If Mario doesn't find these star things, I'll have the princess, but then I can forget about my keep..... Can you run that past me again?" ~Bowser

"Just ignore that idiot!" ~Toadstool, who doesn't know what she's talking about, because Bowser's AWESOME

"(I'm so sly!)" ~Bowser

Like the moon over
the day, my genius and brawn
are lost on these fools. ~haiku (Bowser)

"Mario! Prepare yourself for the great beyond!" ~ Bowser

"Fungah! Foiled again!" ~ Bowser

"Mwa ha ha!" ~ Bowser

Toadstool Quotes

"Oh, my! That's awful! Horrible! ......isn't it?" ~Princess Toadstool

"Anyway, I came by to pick up Toadstool, since she's a bit late." ~Toad

"So, Toadstool and I are allies now! ...I'll never live this one down!" ~Bowser

"Back off, I'm a princess!" ~Princess Toadstool

"Tastes... peachy!" ~Belome

Smithy Quotes

"Yo Smithy!" ~Geno

"Please...don't make us go through any more!" ~Toadstool

"GET OUTTA MY CASTLE!!" ~Bowser

"Guuuooooo!" ~Smithy

"Guoo!! I am burning with power!" ~Smithy

"Gwa ha ha!" ~Smithy

"This CAN'T be happening!!" ~Smithy

"Guoooooooooooo! C...can't m...move.." ~Smithy

"Never have I been so wronged! It is time! I will show you my true form! I will show you my true power! And I will have my revenge!" ~a seriously ticked off Smithy

Other SMRPG Quotes

"How DISGUSTING! That stuff must be CORROSIVE!!" ~Booster

"Booster, sir! There's a 70% chance that the object you're standing on is a cake!" ~Snifit 1

"Wasn't that a cushy bed?" ~Hinopio

"Ve make za cake for za BIG vedding!" ~Chef Torte

"They say I'm a hothead, but I'll show them!" ~Punchinello

"Punchinello? Never heard of ya!" ~Mallow

"That looks nothing like me!" ~Valentina

"I wonder when my next bride will fall from the sky." ~Booster

"997! 998! 999! 1000! Nya ha ha! 1000 arrows!" ~Bowyer

"I am matter.....I am antimatter... I can see your past.....I can see your future....I consume time.....and I will consume you!" ~Culex, the Dark Night of Vanda

"Give it back...or....or we won't be your friends!" ~Snifit 3

"If you defeat me, you STILL won't beat me! Beware the flood!" ~Belome

"Anything that falls into the sea is mine!" ~Johnny

"Good day. The name's Nello... Punchinello!" ~I'm not telling

"I'm resting up for Mother Brain." ~Samus

Made-up Nintendo quotes

"I wonder what dress I'll wear today. OOPS! I forgot, I always wear the same dress! I sure wish that those guys at Nintendo would let me wear something else!" ~Princess Toadstool

"DIDN'T I TELL YOU TO CHILL?!" ~Toad

"Mario! The Princess has been captured!" ~Toad
"Yeah. So what's new?" ~Mario

"I must eat you, Culex......" ~Wind Crystal

"How did you get through all the platform walls? Did my magician, Kamek, show you?" ~Larry Koopa

"Cross the fence, get Mario, cross the fence, get Mario!" ~Red-Shelled Koopa from Iggy Koopa's Castle.

"Shoot! I missed him!" ~Kamek

"Bombs awaaaaaayyy!" ~Lakitu

"Stomp Stomp!" ~Yellow Yoshi

"Who are you? Don't hurt me, I'm small!" ~Lemmy Koopa

"Hooray! A dog! I always wanted one!" ~Toad from Super Mario Bros. Mushroom Kingdom Castle

"Hi. Walk on me." ~Jugem's Cloud

"Stomp! Hah! I almost got you that time!" ~Kuribo's Shoe

"Oh no, a salesman! He seems to be wearing a red shirt, red hat with a M on it, blue overalls, and brown shoes. AHA! He's from the 'Mike's Wonderful Shop' down Jugem's right! I should have known!" ~Lakitu

"I'm sorry, our princess is in another castle. ...Just kidding!! Hahaha!" ~evil clone of the Princess that wants you to die of a heart attack

Miscellaneous Quotes

"Supercow! MOOOOOO!" ~Supercow

"Animals are marching, marching in a band....it is a super band...best band in the land! Hoo!" ~ Sillabub's insane friend

"Cheer up, Sleepy Jean; Oh, what can it mean for a daydream believer and a homecoming queen?" ~Davy Jones, Daydream Believer

"Five hundred twenty five thousand six hundred minutes....How do you measure a year in the life?" ~"Seasons of Love," Rent

"Paul is dead" ~reveroF sdleiF yrrebwartS

"Ha ha!! We'll break into her locker and PLAGIARIZE IT!!" ~Cassandra

"Are those cookies you have there?" ~Bryan

"JFK doesn't HAVE a birthday!!!!!!" ~Amy

"Well I did just a muck worch as see did!" ~Ajna teh prat tmie dilxesic.

"Love was out to get me....or that's the way it seemed.." ~Micky Dolenz, I'm a Believer

"I'm gonna buy me a dog!" ~Micky Dolenz, Gonna Buy Me a Dog

"Love is the ultimate trip." ~Micky Dolenz

"You look just like her, you do! I know by lookin' at you that you've been listenin' to your Auntie Grizelda!" ~Peter Tork, Auntie Grizelda

"Mmm-mm went the little green frog one day! Mmm-mm went the little green frog! Mmm-mmm went the little green frog one day, and they all went mm-mm-ah! But we all know frogs go *clap* lah dee dah dee dah, *clap* lah dee dah dee dah, *clap* Lah dee dah dee dah! We all know frogs go *clap* lah dee dah dee dah! They don't go mm-mm-ah." ~The Little Green Frog Song (unofficial theme of His Hill Ranch Camp '97, Middle School Week)

"Frogs... cows... Davy Jones... Where will the insanity end?!" ~ Mr. Kipper

"Merry Christmas!! Ho ho ho." ~ Santa Claus

"What a time to be caught without a turtleneck!" ~Peter Halsten Thorkelson

"Oh, brother. They don't REALLY live in a yellow submarine. It's more a... burnt goldenrod colour." ~ a mysterious individual known only to us as Mr. Smith

"Anyone who doesn't love me because I'm beautiful loves me because I'm astonishingly intelligent and witty." ~An-chan

"I'm dead? No one informed me of this!" ~ George Washington, October 5, 1997

"Man, you don't wanna mess with me, man, I'm a CHIHUAHUA, man. I'll BITE you." ~ Ignacio the Chihuahua

"Our honor has been smearched." ~Peter
"What?" ~Mike
"Smurped." ~Peter
"What?" ~Mike
"Be-dirtied." ~Peter
"What?" ~Mike
"Well, they hurt my feelings." ~Peter

"Wilkommen! It's a wonderful day in the neighborhood, ja?" ~ Otto van Schnitzelpuskrakengescheitmeir

"Hi, I'm Bob." ~Bob
"Hi, I'm Joe." ~Joe
"We're Bob and Joe." ~Bob
"But you can call us..." ~Joe
"Bob and Joe." ~Bob and Joe

"See this big 'H'? This is where we're going to drop the hospital." ~does it matter?

"I do not suffer from insanity. I enjoy every moment of it." ~Some dog

"Wa wa wa." ~Chachi

"Nobody ever lends money to a man with a sense of humour." ~Peter Tork

"You FOOLS!! HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!" ~Sister Mary Rachel Christine

"I... am a plant. I am green. I supply you with oxygen." ~Leafbert

"in•ter•lope v. to intrude or interfere with the affairs of another." ~Webster

"Oh yeah?! Well... YOU STINK!!!!" ~A.J.

"e=mc²" ~Einstein's theory of relativity

"Boo." ~ A really scary person

"The 80's are coming back." A scarier person

"I wish the 80's would come back." ~ the scariest person

"Ist Holger nett?" ~Steffi
"Ja, aber findet Tennis langweilig. Das ist schade." ~Tara
"Ja, schade." ~Steffi

"I darn you to heck." Phil, the prince of insufficient light

"As if that's an accurate representation of how the common television watcher casually expresses himself!" ~ A television watcher watching a television watcher casually expressing himself, casually expressing himself

" 'Ay-chihuahua?' I find this highly offensive." ~ a learnêd dog

"What's ironic mean? It's sort of, like, when you, like, do something, and then, like, you go, like, 'Oh, my gosh! Like, that was, like, totally ironinc!' You know?" ~ one of the world's future leaders

"Some people say it's a dog-eat-dog world. I think it's the complete opposite." ~ a man dressed as a chicken wearing a sombrero, doing the Macarena and eating a head of lettuce

"I've got cabin fever!" ~some dude
"I've got it tü!" ~ some other dude who talks really coolish.

"I'm comin' for ya, Davy!" ~Tomorrow

"You know, that's not at all nice to say." ~Peter Tork

"Come on Davy, quit fooling around! What TV show was she watching?" ~Peter Tork

"Remember everyone, drugs are bad because they're an addictive solution to a greater problem causing disease of both body and mind with consequences far outweighing their supposed benefits. So please, stay drug free!" ~RavenIIIll

"This U.S. Senate Bean Soup is pretty good!" ~ paranoia boy

"Can ya smell what the Rock is cookin'?" ~The Rock

"Stupid dishes,everyday Thomas do the dishes!" ~Thomas

"Die you must kill you i will!" ~Thomas (I think)

"You worthless piece of scrap metal, did you think you could defeat me?" ~Vile,Mega Man X

"When in doubt, duck. When certain, don't bother, because you're already screwed." ~Meredith Rose

"Nothing is ever too good to be true." ~Michael Faraday

"Don't juggle knives unless you're really, really good at it." ~Meredith Rose

All that is gold does not glitter,
Not all those who wander are lost;
The old that is strong does not wither,
Deep roots are not reached by the frost.
From the ashes a fire shall be woken,
A light from the shadows shall spring;
Renewed shall be blade that was broken,
The crownless again shall be king.
~ The Riddle of Strider, The Fellowship of the Ring, J.R.R. Tolkien

"If he forgets, I shall roast him." ~Gandalf, The Fellowship of the Ring, J.R.R. Tolkien

"I want America for my birthday!" ~ Kootiepie, A.K.A. Wendy O., on her 'sweet' sixteen (A question from the submitter: "WHY????")

"Sorry, Luigi, I didn't see you. The sun was in my eyes." ~ Mario
"I was not!" ~ The Sun

"Vee vere small, angry men vith hairy faces und burning feet. Vee vas running away from proverty, intolerance, ze law, und ze army." ~ Firesign Theatre

"If it walks like a duck, and talks like a duck, then it's an angle addition postulate." ~ JonZ's crazy Geometry teacher

"The man who thought himself above all of his brothers was the man who found himself an only child. Always consider your opponent an equal, until he is proven to be otherwise." ~ JonZ, Robyn in the Hood

"It's zero degrees outside today, and tonight it'll be twice as cold!" ~ Weatherman Joe

"AS THE JUSTICE FIGHTERS AWAKEN, HERE'S LUNAR!!!!!" ~Lunar

"Am I so bad you have to talk about me behind my front?" ~Fenrus
"Well, it's hard to take you seriously when you wear that silly hat!" ~Erasmus
"It's part of the uniform!" ~Fenrus
"Sometimes I wish you were a newt!" ~Erasmus
"Why?" ~Fenrus
"Because newts can't talk!" ~Erasmus
"Neither can most rats!" ~Fenrus

"Duo's butt is small and flat." ~Hans

"Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die." ~Inigo Montoya

"Laa Laa play wit' de ball.... INDOORS!" ~Laa Laa

"Po 'cooter!" ~Po

"I want to tell you that they are not cute!" ~Chibiusa

"Son of a submariner!" ~Kefka

"If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame!" ~Mickey

"My favorite part about my job is meeting new people....Then, of course, pummeling them senseless." ~Jim

"How many times do I hafta tell you? I am NOT to be used..... AS A PROJECTILE!!" ~Bob the killer goldfish, after being thrown by #4

"So remember kids, don't run through walls.  It may not be the cool way but it's the safe way." ~Narrator

"Remember, if she asks, we are *NOT* rebels bent on her destruction." ~What's Her Name

"You're not the regular horn-stylists! ....Say....Are you rebels bent on my destruction?" ~The Queen, after she crawls into the salon

"Do you MOCK me, O spoon??! Then I shall be your MASTERR!" ~The Archbug, talking to his spoon (again)

"Hey you....You.....Thing-taker guy!" ~Evil Jim, to Jim, after our hero takes Evil Jim's gun away.

"We continue our story on planet HECK, where EVIL The Cat worships at the altar of Vileness....." ~Narrator
"I'm just watching TV....." ~Evil the Cat
"Same thing." ~Narrator

"You'll have to excuse me, my sister wants me to stay away." ~Daria

"Just remember: when you're popular, all unpopular people look alike anyway." ~Daria

"Knock knock!" ~Micky
"Who's there?" ~Mike
"Wa." ~Micky.
"Wa who?" ~Mike
"That's right, wahoo." ~Micky.

"Mike turned the Monkeemobile into a low rider." ~George Michael Dolenz

"What has 6 eyes, 6 legs and not very long to live?" ~Dragon of the moat
"Three dumb peasants." ~Micky
"You're right, lower the draw bridge." ~Dragon of the moat

"I need a glass of water." ~Micky
"Why?" ~Davy
"I wanna see if my neck leaks." ~Micky

"I just got back from Africker, and I was playing cards with the natives." ~Davy
"Oh, Zooloos?" ~Micky
"No, I usually won." ~Davy

"What do you sink you might order?" ~Patrick Stewart
"I think I would order the duck." ~Steve Martin
"HA! you sink wiss a statement like ziss you can order ze duck! You can have ze chicken." ~Patrick Stewart

"This is WAR, Peacock, you can't make an omelette without breaking a few eggs...any cook 'll tell you that!" ~Col. Mustard
"But look what happened to the cook!" ~Peacock

"Just like the Mounties, we always get our man." ~Watsworth
"Mrs. Peacock was a MAN!?" ~Mr. Green

"Why is J. Edgar Hoover on your phone?" ~Mr Green
"I don't know. He's on everybody else's, why shouldn't he be on mine?" ~Watsworth

"To make a long story short..." ~Watsworth
"Too late!" ~everyone else

"Mr. Body threatened to tell my dear old mother. The shock would have killed her." ~Col. Mustard
"That's particularly inept, considering you told us that she's dead already." ~Mrs. White

"Why would anyone want to kill him twice? It seems so unnecessary." ~Mrs. Peacock
"That's what we in the business call over kill." ~Professor Plum

"My brother got his arm caught in a microwave and my grandma got run over by a busload of penguins, so it's kind of a family crisis." ~John Cusac

"I... know that guy..." ~Trowa Barton

"Outer space has lost all reason! That's why I'm gonna destroy EVERYTHING!!! That's natural...isn't it?!" ~Quatre Raberba Winner

"Omae o korosu." ~Heero Yuy (pansy-wuss)

"Son of a gun." ~Chang Wu Fei
"Right?" ~Duo Maxwell

"As a priest, it's my duty to pry into people's lives!" ~Takuan Sohou

"When I'm serious, no-one can refuse me!" ~Fish Eye
"Is that so? You must show me your seriousness sometime!" ~Tiger's Eye (wink wink, nudge nudge)

"Itai yo!" ~Palla Palla

"A pure heart came out!" ~Minako-chan

"Has Mako-chan changed her choice?" ~Ami-chan

"One option... destruction." ~Hotaru-chan

"Well, we found some cheese." ~Choristers of Doom

"Confucios say: He who stand on toilet seat high on pot." ~K'ung Fu-Tzu