I cut my playlist, previously... *checks* 242 songs, down to 92. Why have I done such a thing, you ask? I tell you: I ripped my area audition pieces from CD and added them to my playlist. Since I love my music so much, I'd be too heartbroken to pass it up in favour of my audition songs every time I was on the computer. Solution? Make it so I hear them more often when I do listen to my playlist! Hooray! It's not so bad, since I only took off songs I'm not terribly attached to. I mean, I *like* all the songs on my playlist, but I only *REALLY LIKE* ... well, 92 of them... Heh heh. I like music. ^_^()()()()
I'm such a bad person who neglects her journal. Oh well, too bad. Muwa.
So anyway. Ever since I first got stress-- which was when I was 6-- I've been biting my nails. Since that time, I've tried approximately once a year something (anything) to break the habit. It's never worked, obviously. I got very very close my freshman year of high school, but it just didn't happen... bleh. However-- no nail polish, no artificial nails, no bad tasting stuff to deter you from nailbiting, no gloves, no NOTHING-- I've not bitten my nails at *all* in eight days! "Wow, you stunning incarnation of Human Contemplation, how DID you do it?" I chipped a tooth. *HORROR* But I really did! *NIGHTMARES* Oh, it was aweful... I never want to experience that terrible feeling again... that is, it didn't hurt. But I was all like *chew chew* and then there were tiny fragments of tooth in my mouth. O_O()()() It was AWEFUL!! AAAAIIIIYAA!!! And you KNOW I've always been so vain about my teeth! Fortunately, it was an infinitesimal chip that heartily avoids all detection to all but myself, meaning I can retain my vanity re: teeth. HOWEVER. It *frightened* me, you see. Because I bit my nails, MY BEAUTIFUL TEETH WERE DAMAGED. How can this be prevented? By not biting my nails anymore. "If it were that easy," you say, "why haven't you stopped before now? After all, you always knew it was bad for you, and you've always wanted to quit." You are correct. However, two very important reasons have helped me out this time:
1) I'm vain about my teeth. If I continue to bite my nails, my teeth may be further damaged. "Surely you didn't think bitten nails was attractive." Indeed no. However, I have never been overly fond of my abnormally tiny hands, and thus have never been vain about the hand/finger region. Certainly I didn't enjoy having bitten nails, but since I was never under the illusion that NOT having bitten nails would magically make my hands, as a whole, *nice*, it wasn't enough incentive. But even that would probably have been enough to get me to quit if it weren't for reason number
2) Nailbiting is something I do unconsciously. I don't sit there thinking "now I think I shall chew my nail," it just *happens*. That's why it's a habit. However, in this scenario, every time I subconsciously place my finger in my mouth for easy gnaw-age, *I FEEL THE CHIP IN MY TOOTH*. This is sufficient crack injection for my conscious mind, which then says to my hand "HEY GET OUT OF THAT MOUTH YOU'LL BREAK SOMETHING." And the hand is all, "Waaaah!"
Yes, you are so happy to know all of that. You can thank me later.
I'm gonna apply for a job at Barnes & Noble. I gots to get paid. I don't want to *work*... but if I'm going to Vancouver for the summer ((I REALLYREALLYREALLY WANT TO GO TO VANCOUVER FOR THE SUMMER)) and/or go to Anime Expo 2002 ((I REALLYREALLYREALLY WANT TO GO TO ANIME EXPO 2002)), I will require some means of financing these little excursions. AnJa's in college, so by definition she's broke. My income comes from my allowance of about $22 a month, which is (don't be surprised!) substantially less than the cost of renting an apartment and/or hotel room, neglecting the price of actual transportation to [and from] Vancouver/California. Granted, the object of going to Vancouver is to WORK-- voice act, that is. This is NOT a pipe dream. I'm not conceited about it, but I know I don't suck, and I'm not gonna quit at this. It's my ambition-- I'd say dream, but that makes it sound like I don't think I'll achieve it-- and I'm not going to give up, ever. In fact... I hereby declare to the Pokemon of the world that I will defeat and capture all of you!!!!!!! ... back to what I was actually talking about. The reason we'd be going to Vancouver would be to work, which would provide the necessary income to, you know, survive, but it's not fantastically likely we'd already *HAVE* jobs at the moment we arrived, and there's no guarantee we'd get any right away anyway. ... I need to make a demo tape. But anyway, we'd still need MONEY MONEY MONEY. I really want to go... I hope it works out... ... and as for Anime Expo, MAN do I wanna go. O_O() If for no other reason than to finally meet Hans in person. I mean, we've been really good friends for like five years, so it's about time, y'dig? And he's a lazy bum so he's never gonna come see me in Texas. For which I'll have to punish him at some point, but I can't punish unless I see him in person, hence: Anime Expo 2002. And I wanna cosplay! XD
Other than getting a job *horror*, I've thought of a way I may be able to get a few hundred bucks toward going to California. For a decent class ring, the cost is about $200-300, and a letter jacket that doesn't suck is around $100. I don't want either of them all that badly. BUT. I asked my dad about maybe contributing any money they WOULD have spent on letter jacket / ring to a trip fund sorta thing, and he said what I hope is the equivalent of "n'kah". I just need to find information, get a definite cost for the trip, etc. and I'll have a more concrete answer. I need to get a job, anyway. There are things I want, and I'm not very good at stealing yet. (it's a JOKE!!) Plus, my friend Rae has worked at Barnes & Noble for more than half a year, and she really likes it. Since I love bookstores anyway and the job wouldn't entail my dealing with gross things... I think I wouldn't loathe it as much as pretty much any other job I might possibly get. Of course, all this is true, but I still really don't want to work. I'm just full of Acedia. O_O()
There's a choir trip to Dallas in the spring. I don't want to go. I'm afraid Scur will guilt me into going even though I really really don't want to. I'm not very good at standing firm in the face of "we can't do it without you" and the like... but I already decided not to be in the musical, either. That's because I've decided I really am gonna get a job, and if I have a job AND rehearsal every day and all that kinda stuff, my life will suck. But since I made THAT decision (and it's gonna be hard enough sticking with that one, BUT I'M GOING TO), it makes it that much harder to flat-out say NO to the choir trip. You know, I am such an Asian. Too bad I'm. Not. Ha ha ha.
FFIX chatter! I'm on disc 3-- not sure how far through it. I just got the Hilda Garde 3 and I.. uhh.. *think* Um, I forgot where I'm supposed to go now, but I'll remember. As for characters whose names I have not yet revealed!
Eiko- Noir. Because there's this chick in an assassin group called "Noir" on an anime of the same name that kinda looks like her, and I thought it would be funny if Eiko was named after a cold-blooded killer O_O()() And plus, she's a WHITE mage, and "noir" means BLACK, and... uhh... nevermind. Hey, that means I have two characters whose names mean "black" in foreign languages! Count Schwarz in, baby! Whoo-HOO!
Amarant- Reuven. This one night I was lying awake and I thought "hey, when I get Amarant, I should name him 'Reverend'." Then I was all "groooovy." Cos I thought it would be. Groovy. And I still think it would be groovy. However, when I got him in my party and it was time to name him, it totally slipped my mind what I had wanted to name him O_O!! I remembered it was a Latin derivative and it had an "r" and a "v" in it, and then I thought how the "ruv" beginning means "red" in Latin, and since he's "Red-haired man," something that sounds like that would be appropriate, so even though I knew it wasn't the name I originally chose for him, I decided on Reuven. Yeah, it's not Latin, but it SOUNDS like the "ruv" thing, and it has an R and a V. So now he's my good Jewish bounty hunter type. O_O A couple days later I remembered what I planned to name him, of course.
I finished the Purgatorio today. I always picture Beatrice as looking like Beatrix. ^_^() Well, they ARE the same name exactly, just different anglicisations. The actual Latin word in the nominal is "beatrix," but the stem is "beatric," so both are equally correct. Literally, "beatrix" is "blesser" O_O() you know, someone who blesses. A "bringer of joy," if you will. The masculine is "beator." In case you cared. And I *know* you did.
So back to FFIX. I'm learning everyone's abilities before I go on (I did the same thing before the second visit to Black Mage Village). It takes a while, but it makes everyone really strong and I don't have to equip them with something weaker if it turns out they need an ability it gives them. This time around, it's not so bad since I really only have a couple new weapons for people rather than the mass-learning I had to do earlier. I equip Auto-Reflect, Ability Up, and Antibody, and go fight Grand Dragons on Popos Heights =3 6 AP per battle plus a rather nice EXP bonus is not too shabby, EH. And as for my darling Choco, he's gold, and I've found all the Chocograph and Dead Pepper treasures except for one-- the Ultima Weapon one. And I'd go take my chances with that one too, but I don't seem to be able to get to it just yet ^_^() If I CAN and I'm just doing something wrong, DON'T TELL ME, EH!!! And my mad Tetra Master skillz are improving, as well. I've got 67 different types of cards, and I'm not gonna stop until I HAVE THEM AAAALL!!! MWAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Poor Mene ;_;
Even though there's other stuff to talk about and stuff, I don't feel like writing anymore. Put that in your bong and smoke it, you bloody communists!